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Sydney Villeneuve

Feeling Valuable and Unworthy

When talking about self-esteem and self-worth, the terms are often used interchangeably, when in actuality they impact the way we see ourselves quite differently. So, what is the difference and how do they each feel?

 

Self-esteem is how you feel towards the way you outwardly deliver yourself and how you are received by others. It is perceived from more of a bird's-eye view, from first impressions to your felt successes and achievements. Our relationship with our self-esteem is experienced by how we feel about our outer, most-perceived self, or the way we introduce ourself to the world.




Self-esteem is determined by the value placed on our… 

  • First Impressions 

  • Career Choice(s)

  • Hobbies & Interests 

  • Economic Status & Assets

  • Physical Appearance

  • & More 

High self esteem can leave you feeling proud and confident, where low self-esteem can feel like powerlessness and self doubt.




Self-worth is about our internal sense of self--how we evaluate and measure out our worth as a living being. It is the worth we attribute to our character, personality traits, values, moral system, etc. It is also measured by how capable we believe ourselves to be. Our self-worth can even extend to how we feel we are perceived and valued within our relationships beyond what we tangibly “bring to the table."

High self-worth can feel reassuring and safe, where low self-worth could feel shameful and undeserving




Thoughts about your self-worth can sound like: 

  • I am a loving person

  • I don’t contribute to the goodness of this world 

  • I provide security to myself

  • I don’t think I have what it takes to push through 

  • I am worthy of love and connection

  • I am unimportant and replaceable 

  • I am a good friend, partner, parent, etc. 

  • I am not strong enough to handle this 

  • I am resilient and resourceful 





Surprisingly enough, self-esteem and self-worth do not always align with one another. While you can have both high or low self-esteem and self-worth, you can also be navigating how it feels to have high self-esteem with low self-worth, or low self-esteem with high self-worth. The two exist on parallel, everchanging spectrums that don’t always influence the other.  Being aware and attuned to where you sit with your self-esteem and self-worth is valuable when working on your identity, and on your relationship to yourself and other people in your life. The love, compassion and boundaries you hold and create space for are built from the foundation of where you face yourself—engaging in this form of inner work is worth its weight in gold, just like you!





Sources

*Graphics created using Zinnia


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